So as of last Monday, Eva started attending nursery and I’ve officially stopped being a full time mum. Although I’m super nervous for her and myself, I know that it’s actually the best thing for her. She’s such a social little girl and loves trying new activities. She will be going two days a week as I go back to work full time. That's right, 9 to 5, Monday to Friday. No days off for me.
Almost 75% of mother’s work either full or part time, the primarily motivator being financial. In 2018, in most parts of the UK, takes two wages and some serious budgeting. For me it was never a question of whether or not I would be returning to work. We bought our home with a relatively small mortgage but we do happen to live in one of the most expensive parts of the UK. But aside from the financial commitments, I’ve always been career driven and enjoyed working. Becoming a mum didn’t change that, instead I’ve become more driven to provide a brilliant life for my family.
Historically the onus has fallen to women to reduce their hours, work flexibly or not return to work due to childcare. When I first found out about my pregnancy it was my first major concern. I've heard the horror stories about the cost of childcare and how often it can be financially pointless for one parent to return to the workplace. More often than not this falls to the mother. More women than ever before are the main breadwinners in their household, just over one third in 2016.
It was a discussion which Luke and I had at the very early stages of our pregnancy. I've always been the more career driven one in our relationship. I graduated in 2014 with a degree in Business Management and immediately embarked on a graduate scheme with a FTSE 100 company specialising in Human Resources. Basically from the age of 16 my career has been my focus and honestly, I really love it and I want to climb that career ladder.
The arrival of Eva ensured that the focus shifted. I was determined to take the full year off as I knew it was unlikely I'd ever have this opportunity again. Through budgeting and saving whilst pregnant I managed to save enough to 'pay' myself my normal wage whilst I was on statutory maternity pay. As such Eva and I have developed an amazing bond and connection, we spend 10 hours a day together unaided and it's been an honour to be her primary carer this past year.
However when I go back to work this will change massively. I am doing so in a client facing role which requires five day a week contact, so a specific day off just wouldn't work for me or my employer. I am a great advocate of having a healthy home life balance and I'm pretty good at switching off when I get home and leaving the emails alone!
As such we had to come up with a plan. Childcare is so expensive as most of you know. The cost of childcare has risen seven times faster in the UK than wages. As the costs increase year on year, wages have plateaued. Added to the fact that parents of one year old's returning to work after maternity leave receive no government support until their second birthday. Logically this support would be so much more useful at the age of one. Coming off maternity leave, with no proper pay for 6 months even enrolling your child in nursery is expensive. We paid registration fees and deposits to secure her place which we had to budget for. This can be the barrier to returning to work for many parents, when childcare is so expensive that it's almost pointless to go back to work for someone else to look after your child.
After discussions with our family we decided that Eva would spend two days with her grandma, leaving three days to work around. Luke decided to apply for a condensed week as it was really important for him to have time off with Eva during the week to grow their relationship. His employer has been amazing, working with him to ensure that he only works his hours and doesn't take anything home or is called on his day off. Luckily he was able to take this from Eva being three months old which has meant we've been able to spend more time together as a family. Also it breaks up the week for me, I get another set of hands and eyes to help with Eva.
It's important that more men discuss these options with their employers. Luke has made it work with his and it's beneficial for both parties. They did say to him that most of the requests of this type comes from women, so he is working with them to promote it internally too.
So that's our new normal! I am sad that I won't have a dedicated 'Eva day' but it definitely means we will make the most of weekends and holidays which we have together. I'll check in next month to discuss how I've found my first few weeks as a full time working mum!
The arrival of Eva ensured that the focus shifted. I was determined to take the full year off as I knew it was unlikely I'd ever have this opportunity again. Through budgeting and saving whilst pregnant I managed to save enough to 'pay' myself my normal wage whilst I was on statutory maternity pay. As such Eva and I have developed an amazing bond and connection, we spend 10 hours a day together unaided and it's been an honour to be her primary carer this past year.
However when I go back to work this will change massively. I am doing so in a client facing role which requires five day a week contact, so a specific day off just wouldn't work for me or my employer. I am a great advocate of having a healthy home life balance and I'm pretty good at switching off when I get home and leaving the emails alone!
As such we had to come up with a plan. Childcare is so expensive as most of you know. The cost of childcare has risen seven times faster in the UK than wages. As the costs increase year on year, wages have plateaued. Added to the fact that parents of one year old's returning to work after maternity leave receive no government support until their second birthday. Logically this support would be so much more useful at the age of one. Coming off maternity leave, with no proper pay for 6 months even enrolling your child in nursery is expensive. We paid registration fees and deposits to secure her place which we had to budget for. This can be the barrier to returning to work for many parents, when childcare is so expensive that it's almost pointless to go back to work for someone else to look after your child.
After discussions with our family we decided that Eva would spend two days with her grandma, leaving three days to work around. Luke decided to apply for a condensed week as it was really important for him to have time off with Eva during the week to grow their relationship. His employer has been amazing, working with him to ensure that he only works his hours and doesn't take anything home or is called on his day off. Luckily he was able to take this from Eva being three months old which has meant we've been able to spend more time together as a family. Also it breaks up the week for me, I get another set of hands and eyes to help with Eva.
It's important that more men discuss these options with their employers. Luke has made it work with his and it's beneficial for both parties. They did say to him that most of the requests of this type comes from women, so he is working with them to promote it internally too.
So that's our new normal! I am sad that I won't have a dedicated 'Eva day' but it definitely means we will make the most of weekends and holidays which we have together. I'll check in next month to discuss how I've found my first few weeks as a full time working mum!
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